Best Collection of New English Funny SMS at Funny SMS

A collection of english funny sms text messages, jokes and humorous text messages. To send to amuse and please your friends with these great funny mobile english funny sms. You can also submit english funny sms here.

Latest English Funny SMS:

  • Problem
    Raju Went to a Doctor to Get a Solution of Loose Motions..

    Doctor : Tell Me, What is your Problem??

    Raju : Suffering from Unlimited Free Outgoings with Different Different Ringtones...:-):-D

  •   By: Rabia Naz   Send To Mobile
  • No Response
    John Feared that His Wife Anna was not Hearing Well.

    He Called a Doctor Who Told Him a Simple Test.

    "Talk from 40 ft away in the in casual tone.
    If She does not hear u, go to 30 ft then 20 ft & so on until u get a responce".

    In Evening, Wife was in Kitchen, He was in Lounge.

    In Normal Tone he asks: "Honey, what 4 Dinner"?

    No Responce.

    He moves closer about 30 ft but still no response.

    Next he moves 20 ft, again no response.

    So he Walk up right behind Her: "Anna, what's 4 dinner"?


    She Said :

    "For God Sake John, For the 5th Time i am Telling:

    CHICKEN"....;-p :-D

  •   By: Naghma Khan   Send To Mobile
  • Really Born
    ** Technology Impact **

    Year 2030:

    Father Angrily to His Little Kid:

    "I Told You a Hundred Times that,

    You Were REALLY BORN,

    Not Downloaded,

    Believe Me".....:-) :-D

  •   By: Maha Abro   Send To Mobile
  • Ticket
    A Ticket Collector in a Train Fines Rs.400 fo no Ticket.

    He Charged 1st Girl Rs.300 bcoz she had no ticket and She Wearing Sleavless.

    Rs.200 to 2nd Girl bcoz she had no ticket and she was Wearing sleavless & Backless.

    Rs.100 to 3rd girl bcoz she had no ticket and she was Wearing sleavless, backless & Mini Skirt.

    He Charged Rs.0 to the 4rth one,






    God Bless Your Mentality.


    Bcoz She had the Ticket...;-p :-D

  •   By: Sumaira Malik   Send To Mobile
  • Ladies Hands
    Why Do Men Hold Ladies Hands in the Corridors of Malls??


    Bcoz If they Leave Their Hands

    They will Go to Every Shop 4 Shopping.

    It Looks Romantic But

    Its Economic...:-)

  •   By: Naghma Khan   Send To Mobile
  • Robot
    John : Your Secretory is very Sexy.

    Tom : Thanks! Its a Robot. Actually, named "Monika",
    If U Squeez her Right breast, She takes Dictation,
    & If U squeez Her Left breast, She Types Letters.

    I'll Lend it to U for a day & you can See Her Functions..

    Next Day..

    John called Tom from Hospital & Shouted :

    "You Bastard! You didn't Tell Me that the "HOLE" between
    Monika's Leg is a Pencil Sharpner"....:-0 :-)

  •   By: Husnain Nawaz   Send To Mobile
  • Knowledge Is Money

    A Gaint Ship's Engine was failed.

    The Owners tried to 1 Expert to another

    but non could fix the engine.

    At last an Oldman was consulted who examined throughly the Owners' Presence.

    Then He took out his Hammer and Tapped something.

    The Engine Started instantly..

    A week later Owners received a Bill for $ 10,000.

    "What, He did nothing!" They Exclaimed and asked for the

    Detailed Itemized Bill.

    They Got Detailed Bill as:

    Tapping with Hammer= $1

    Knowing where the Tap= $9999

    = $10,000...:-)

  •   By: Raheel Ahmed   Send To Mobile
  • War
    If Women Ruled the World be not Wars.

    Just a Bunch of Jealous, Countries not talking to

    Each Others....:-)

  •   By: Naghma Khan   Send To Mobile
  • Best Things
    Two Best Things are a Small Child Teaches us..

    1- To Be Happy without any Reason.

    2- To Be Always Busy Doing something..:-0

  •   By: Maha Abro   Send To Mobile
  • Vegetarian
    Why are Pure Vegetarian Women Silent during sex..?


    They Are in a State of Shock

    That a Piece of Meat can give

    so Much Pleasure...:-D

  •   By: Naghma Khan   Send To Mobile
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