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Best Collection of New English Funny SMS at Funny SMS

A collection of english funny sms text messages, jokes and humorous text messages. To send to amuse and please your friends with these great funny mobile english funny sms. You can also submit english funny sms here.

Latest English Funny SMS:

  • The POLITE Way to PEE
    "The POLITE Way to PEE"

    Teacher trying to teach Good Manners
    asked Her Students this question:

    "Michael if U were on a Date having Dinner
    with a Nice Young Lady,
    how wud U tell Her that U have to go to the Bathroom?"

    Michael: "Just a Minute I have to Go Pee"

    Teacher: That would be Rude & Impolite.
    How about U SAM.

    Sam: "I really need 2 go 2 Toilet, I'm sorry".

    Teacher: "That's Better but
    still not nice to say word Toilet.
    Oh U Little Jonny can U use Ur Brain?"

    JONNY:
    "Darling, May I plz b Excused for a Moment?
    I've 2 Shake Hands with a very Dear frnd of Mine,
    whom I hope 2 Introduce 2 U after Dinner"....;):-p


  By: Sumaira Malik   Send To Mobile
  • Piyar Kerta Hun,
    Piyar Kerta Hun,
    Isi Liye Fiker Kerta hun,,

    Jab Nafrat Kerun Ga,
    To Ziker Bhi Nahi Kerun Ga..!


  By: Naghma Khan   Send To Mobile
  • Mistress
    Every Wife is a "Mistress" of Her Husband.

    "MISS" for One Hour
    &
    "STRESS" for 23 Hours Everyday..:-)


  By: Naghma Khan   Send To Mobile
  • FASTEST Communications
    Three FASTEST Means of Communications:

    1. Tele-Phone
    2. Tele-Vision
    &
    3. Tell to Woman
    Need still FASTER...?
    Tell Her NOT to Tell ANY ONE...;-p


  By: Naila Soomro   Send To Mobile
  • Neck of The Family
    It is True That Husband is the Head of the Family,

    But

    Remember that
    Wife is the
    Neck of The Family.

    & the Neck can Turn the Head
    Exactly The Way She Wants...;-p

    Hahaha


  By: Naila Soomro   Send To Mobile
  • I will kill you
    Husband: Why are the Defective Condoms lying on the Sofa.??

    Wife: What..???
    Where..??

    Wife goes to find them and comes back angrily saying:
    ‘I will kill you,
    If U don't Stop Calling Our Children "Defective Condoms"...;-p


  By: Haya Ali   Send To Mobile
  • Hi Darling
    Girl Sitting on a Park Bench.

    Funny Beggar: Hi Darling.

    She angrily: How dare U call me as darling.?

    Beggar: Then what r U Doing on My Bed?...:-)


  By: Naila Soomro   Send To Mobile
  • A Couple was Having Dinner
    A Couple was Having Dinner at a Fancy Restaurant.

    As the food was served the Husband said:
    The food looks Delicious, let’s Eat.

    Wife: Honey.!
    You say Prayer before Eating at Home.

    Husband: That’s at Home sweetheart!
    Here the Chef knows how to Cook..;-p


  By: Husnain Nawaz   Send To Mobile
  • Winning Essay Is
    Write an Essay which Contains Factors;
    Religion, sex and Mystery.

    Winning Essay Is..!
    "Oh My God, I am Pregnant,
    I wonder who did it"...;-p


  By: Husnain Nawaz   Send To Mobile
  • Group Therapy With Young Mothers
    A Psychiatrist was Conducting
    a Group Therapy with four Young Mothers.

    The doctor observed: “You all have obsessions”

    To the 1st Mother, He said:
    “You are obsessed with eating.
    You’ve even named your daughter ’Candy’.”

    He looks to the 2nd Mother saying,
    “Your obsession is with Money.
    Again, It Manifests itself in your child’s name, Penny.”

    He looks to the 3rd Mother and says:
    “Your obsession is Alcohol.
    This Manifests itself in your child’s name, Brandy.”

    At This Point,
    The 4th Mother Gets up,
    Takes her Little Boy by the hand
    and says to Him:
    “Come on, Dick, We’re leaving”...;-p:)


  By: Husnain Nawaz   Send To Mobile
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